America! Fuck...Yeah?

So, like, we're pretty much winning in Iraq now, right? From the snippets of Fox News I've seen, it's just a matter of days before the victory parades with well-titted white women dressed like red, white and blue spangled lady liberties waving to starry-eyed blonde babies from their slowly passing floats. Maybe after the parades we can all jerk off to the fireworks.

You know how else I know we're winning? I'll show you.


Lookie!!!






Finally, the token inspirational burn child gets to meet Captain America! What else could any young Iraqi kid ever want? Not to get doused in gas and set on fire? Laaaame. Meeting Spiderman dumbass, is way way coooler.


On a side note, and maybe my comic-book inclined friends can inform me, but didn't Captain America die recently? Or was that just a liberal conspiracy to undermine the morale of our troops? Did miracle-worker Petraeus revive him with his immaculate integrity? Did Bush give a no-bid contract to Marvel? Is Joe Lieberman asking to send the rest of the Marvel cast of characters into Iran? Will the X-Men have to adhere to the Geneva conventions?

Oh boy, too many questions, too many questions. Either way, it sure looks like Baghdad's going to get a Universal Studios some time pretty soon. That ought to tame those rascally insurgents and terrorists.