No flying cars, no hoverboards, no time machines, no less a DeLoreon time machine...man Back to the Future was a tease!

So, Ill admit it right now from the get go. This blog really has nothing to do with escaping the Bible Belt. Well, I guess it kinda does, but I am not going to explain it, you readers will just have to imagine it for yourselves.

So I really want a time machine. I honestly don't care what type. Although a DeLoreon time machine would be pretty fucking sweet!

Why do I want a time machine you ask? To see dinosaurs roam the earth? To see modern marvels of the world, like the pyramids or the Great Wall of China or the Golden Gate Bridge, etc.? To relive wars that actually had a purpose? To work with great photographers like Ansel Adams and others? To go into the future and see what is going to happen to me, to my friends and family? To see us living on the moon or other planets once we finally destroy Earth?

No. To all of these. Well, I would like to see the dinosaurs. I was a huge dino-nerd when I was younger. Still kinda am.

So what would I do with a time machine? Simple. I would travel about a year into the future to see what I hope is one of the most violent, most blood spilled, most intense movie...of all fucking time. And no, I am not talking about the True-Life movie based on "Operation Iraqi Freedom/Kill the Terrorists" (or whatever we are currently calling the 9-11 revenge war we are in).

I am talking about "John Rambo." Rambo IV.

The tag line: “When you’re pushed…killing’s as easy as breathing.”

How fucking awesome is that. The plot is even better.

From imdb.com:

"Vietnam veteran John Rambo (Sylvester Stallone) has survived many harrowing ordeals in his lifetime and has since withdrawn into a simple and secluded existence in Bangkok, where he spends his time salvaging old PT boats and tanks for scrap metal. Even though he is looking to avoid trouble, trouble has a way of finding him. A group of Christian human rights missionaries, led by Michael Burnett and Sarah Miller, approach Rambo with the desire to rent his boat to travel up the river to Burma. For over fifty years, Burma has been like a war zone. The Karen people of the region, who consist of peasants and farmers, have endured brutally oppressive rule from the murderous Burmese military and have been struggling for survival every single day. This is the time when medical assistance and general support from the Christian missionaries is needed most. After some consideration, and due to insistence from his mentor, former military man Ed Baumgartner, Rambo accepts the offer and takes Michael, Sarah, and the rest of the missionaries up the river. When the missionaries finally arrive at the Karen village, they are ambushed by the sadistic Major Pa Tee Tint and a slew of Burmese army men. A portion of the villagers and missionaries are tortured and viciously murdered, while Tint and his men hold the remainder captive. News soon reaches the minister in charge of the mission and with the help of Ed Baumgartner he employs Rambo to lead a rescue effort. With five young and highly diverse mercenaries at his disposal, Rambo has to travel back up the river and liberate the survivors from the clutches of Major Tint in what may be one of his deadliest missions ever Written by stallonezone.com

The next chapter finds Rambo recruited by a group of Christian human rights missionaries to protect them against pirates, during a humanitarian aid deliver to the persecuted Karen people of Burma. After some of the missionaries are taken prisoner by sadistic Burmese soldiers, Rambo gets a second impossible job: to assemble a team of mercenaries to rescue the surviving relief workers. Written by aintitcool.com"

And the trailer is even fucking better. Not to take much from it, you should still watch it. But just in the trailer, Stallone cuts someone's head off, shoots someone with a machine gun until they disintegrate into little pieces, nearly rips someone's head off (he actually begins to rip the guys head off), and shoots an arrow into someone causing them to fall on a land mine.

AND THIS IS JUST THE FUCKING TRAILER!!!!! YOU HAVE TO WATCH IT!!!!



If for some reason, you can not watch it here (for some reason they have been removing these form YouTube.com), then you can see it here.


The only bad thing. It doesn't come out until fucking May 2008. Hence the desire for a time machine.

Speaking of Sly. In what I am sure is a totally unrelated story, he was recently fined over $10,000 for importing hormones into Australia. Read more here.
I wonder is Sly is already trying to build up the hype for this movie?

Maybe I will go and find Marty McFly and Doc and tell them to take me to go see this movie tomorrow. Hell, I bet we could just take the DeLoreon to the drive-in.